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Post by Jonny Kirk on Sept 7, 2005 15:09:50 GMT 1
okey, final update before i go. the first video files have been uploaded to the site. they are the much talked about, legendary "the making of sitting on a fence" by JK. the sharp eyed among you will notice that the fence in the video is not the same one i am sitting on in the photo. i spent ages trying to edit the new photo but i gave up.
the files are absolutely huge, but is it worth your while downloading them? no, absolutely not.
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Post by bob on Sept 8, 2005 14:52:52 GMT 1
Spent the morning colouring in my picture for the slush puppy colouring in competition while simultaneously watching Thunderbirds. I'm rather proud of it (the picture, not the Thunderbirds, although they are a great bunch of lads) now all I have to do is decide whether I will put my actual age on the picture before I send it in. I then went into town and met an old man in the park. I attempted to coherce him into talking about the war, but he was having none of it. Oh well, getting a photograph of him and me might have been a little weird anyway. Anyway Tanya is coming to visit next week and I plan to go on a ghost train and to complete the Harry Ramsdens challenge. It appears you get a free dessert and a certificate if you do. Woo Hoo!
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Post by Jonny Kirk on Sept 12, 2005 10:25:12 GMT 1
YES! i have internet access in moira. it appears we have broadband as well on this computer. only problem the computer is so old that it nearly explodes when you try and do anything on it. it took me about 15 minutes one day to try and look up emails one day on it. there might be other computers that i can use, but no site updates for a while.
i'm staying in this ridicuously plush house. my room has an en-suite, and 2 beds. not only that - one of the beds is a ... CRAFTMATIC ADJUSTABLE BED! oh yes it is. i have yet to use it cos i would just sit up all night playing with it.
as for challenges, things are a little slow of yet. however, i am currently making contacts in order to do so. the lady i am staying with has a kite (i was playing with it on saturday but didnt get a photo). her grandsons have recently made homemade jam, and i reckon i could probably bake a cake.
as for things i have done, lot so much big points, but completed nonetheless. i built something out of lego. an easy task when you have all the pieces you need in front of you, but when you have to search through a box with thousands of pieces in it, it suddenly becomes a lot less fun. i have also built a fort of cushions from the sofa (free standing and everything), and more importantly than that, i have fed the ducks (and swans). my parents were with me, and they even bought the bread for me. i even told them about one of the challenges about sticking a picture of mel brooks to a horse. they laughed at that, but not when i told them about grabbing a bull by the horns.
the list is not with me, so there are probably loads of challenges i could have done but missed out on them. i plan to have a big day of stuff done (i get saturday's off it appears) at some point soon.
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sheriff
Yes! Someone else has registered
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Post by sheriff on Sept 13, 2005 17:28:34 GMT 1
bob's cola venture sounds traumatic. i think bob should get points for living in the same town as chris eubank. eubank is one of our funniest living sportsmen. a true character. a few weeks ago, he hijacked a lorry cos it was blocking the road. thats worthy of banter 500 status. he also has a funny voice and was a real good boxer.
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Post by Jonny Kirk on Sept 14, 2005 20:12:11 GMT 1
if you met him, i'd give you the points for "meeting a rubbish celebrity".
i tried drinking 10 mugs of water in 10 minutes. i nearly threw up - i had just eaten dinner. how big do the mugs have to be, and how full are they supposed to be ie how little off the top can the water level be and still count as a mug of water. i think an exact measurement should be given to clarify, which can then be distributed into 10 mugs.
i passed with flying colours earlier. i of course took it completely literally. video file will follow once i get organised down here. i plan to bring the Kirk family laptop down here and use it for the good of banter!
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Post by bob on Sept 16, 2005 23:01:42 GMT 1
Well things appear to be going pretty good lately. Today I faced the almighty task of completing the Harry Ramsdens challenge. It was huge, I laughed my head off when the waitress brought it out. But surprisingly I was so hungary the task of actually eating it didn't seem that bad. however its now almost 10 hours since I ate it and I'm still stuffed. An added bous was a certificate signed by the general manager, a certificate which ends with the hilarious line 'you've earned a plaice in Harry Ramsdens history'. After this Tanya and I went to the funfair and won a prize. This was cunningly acheived by playing a game were Tanya was my only competitor whereby guaranteeing my success. An earlier more legitimate solo attempt failed when I had to try and knock some cans off a shelf. What a waste of a quid. And what was the prize for dessimating my girlfriend in a game in which she actually let me win anyway I hear you ask? A cuddly crab which I named 'Pepsi'. It probably cost about 13p to make. I found that one of the big benefits of the day was the fact that the funfair constantly felt like the first date in the Karate Kid. We also got a picture of Robert Street and tomorrow hopefully some Ghost Train banter will ensue. All in all I believe I earned about 50 points today. Not bad at all.
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Post by Jonny Kirk on Sept 19, 2005 11:46:24 GMT 1
despite the fact that we are in different countries, both myself and AK also managed to find ourseleves at a "fun" fair. it being Funderland. the very word makes me shudder (does that count as a pun based establishment by the way?). we also won a prize there. my first attempt was trying to get baseballs into a bucket, but everything was very bouncy, so they just came flying back out. the person running it kept taunting me, saying "you just put a bit of spin on it", and proceeded to do it with ease. but he was right next to it. later on we found the tin cans game. this was more my style. a "brute force throw this as hard as you can" style game. there were 6 cans, in a pyramid formation. my first shot took 4 of them out, leaving the bottom row - on on the very left, one on the very right. i had 2 bean bags left. i aimed. the left one was taken out. the sweat was building up on the palm of my hands. i shot, i scored, i conquered. again, a waste of 2 pounds. but at least my toy was a teddy scooby doo. ak had two goes at it, again being cheated out of a quid. be we showed those can's who was boss.
before that, we had been on a ghost train. possibly the most rubbish ghost train in the world. i couldnt see anything in it. the only things i saw were the photos on my camera after we had been round. the funniest part of the ride was when a big steek came out near the end, rubbed our heads, and went "raar". but in a really crap style, with no effort whatsoever. the fact that i was able to see him running away spoiled the whole thing. one pound 50 absolutely wasted. though i bet he wondered why there were loads of flashes going off the entire time. if i was to go back, i would take a picture of the guy that came out. all in all, a rubbish ghost train. makes the one at barrys look like jurassic park 2 (officially the jumpiest film in the world).
but the real reason we went there, oh yes, was to ... eat on a roller coaster. we had previously bought a sandwich and a muffin on the way over (i was so tempted to buy some milk). upon entrance, we first located the location of the rollercoaster. Wild Mouse it was called. although not featuring a loop the loop, it did have the ability to make the carriages spin round and round, which isnt the most pleasant experience when you are trying to eat. and not being hungry, with a dry mouth doesnt help either. i tasted a bit of the sandwich before i went round. the bacon wasnt particularly nice. i near barfed at one point cos my mouth was full and dry. the best thing about the rollercoaster is that it took a photo at the end of the part where you go down a big slope. it was a ripoff at 4 pound, but we didnt get any photos on the way round (we got the entire thing on video though). the picture shows us clearly holding a muffin and sandwich, and our mouths stuffed with food. i dont think the guy at the photo booth knew that we did it. such an amazing day it was. apart from the fact that we had to go to Funderland. eugh.
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Post by Jonny Kirk on Sept 22, 2005 12:08:37 GMT 1
i've finally got the laptop up and running down here in moira. which means... i can now update the site (though there is still loads of stuff i dont have access to just yet). and the first update is this: The Banter 500 presentation it's now online. those of you at senior camp should remember the banter 500 night that we had, and here is the presentation to go along with it. it's absolutely huge (at a massive 18 meg), but is good if you want to show others about this, or to relieve those long lost memories. if you want the theme tune to work, you need to download the sound file, and keep it in the same folder that the presentation is in. the sound file is about 3 meg big. To access these, go to www.banter500.com/What_the_flip/what_the_flip.html
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Post by Jonny Kirk on Sept 26, 2005 11:44:28 GMT 1
i told on someone the other day (i cant remember if i added that to the list or not). i got a lift home the other night and when i asked for a goodnight kiss i got punched in the face (there was one other witness to this, but she is sticking up for ruth). it also happens that her dad is my boss. so the next day in work i coloured in a red mark with crayon on my face, just to make her feel bad. unfortunately it faded before i got to work. but i still told!
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Post by bob on Sept 26, 2005 20:27:53 GMT 1
Nothing but failure, I haven't earned a point in over a week. Today I tried to march in a protest rally. The Labour Party Conference began this week in brighton so there are loads of demonstrations going on. When I came home from work today it was live on the news and behind the reporter I could see a march in progress. I grabbed my coat (and my camera) and ran into town......... I missed it.....just.....
As The Littlest Hobo says: 'Maybe tomorrow'.
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Post by Jonny Kirk on Sept 30, 2005 11:25:59 GMT 1
new webpages have been uploaded today. these are:
AK - cry laughing JK - build something out of lego JK - hug a teddy AK and JK - go on a ghost train JK - take the biscuit Everyone - buy a pint of milk
and...
my favourite part of the site so far - AK (featuring JK) - slide down a bowling alley. truly what the banter 500 is all about. sorry bob, but we couldnt tell you about this until now. go download the video! completely worth it i promise you!
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Post by Jonny Kirk on Oct 10, 2005 20:24:20 GMT 1
had a bit of a productive night tonight, courtesy of the wells family. not only did i get over 30 points, but i was also shown a lot of resources for future achievements. yes, the banter 500 club is well and truly underway. i now need to try and think up of things we can do each week to meet demand. in the past 2 weeks we have managed to stand on a rake, get my hand caught in a mousetrap, and we so nearly had a cat at our cell group, only we couldnt because it would have been too scared by the car journey. but i was still able to get to the wells house to do some cat stuff. their mum was strangely up for letting me do strange things to it, such as letting it out of a bag. that photo and more should be up by the end of this week (i make that friday). i havent had time to update lately, but will try and get more done soon.
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Post by teamak on Oct 10, 2005 22:25:13 GMT 1
righteo im sorry i havnt been that vocal on the site but rest assured i have been doing my part of the 500. I cant fill you in with everything i have been doing because its just too funny and i want to wait till its all done but trust me it will be amazing! other than the top secret stuff i have been confusing lots of people taking photos of funny grifiti, street signs and shop titles its amazing what opens up to you when you have your own transportits great! so all my fans out there have no fear team ak is on track and will claim victory for the people
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Post by Jonny Kirk on Oct 11, 2005 17:16:34 GMT 1
good to see you back AK. remember to send some of those amazing banter pictures to me at some point. for fans of team AK (namely those in revelation), i'll have some more photos for you this sunday.
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Post by bob on Oct 12, 2005 16:03:27 GMT 1
I've fallen into some sort of banter depression over the last two weeks. not a single point to my name. I'm beginning to fear that the inpossible could actually happen, team Bob could lose the 500. I know it sounds ridiculous but it seems that its all because of one reason though: knowone to take the photo or enjoy the banter with. But this will soon all change when Tanya moves down here in two weeks, it will be points galore everyday, just you wait.
maybe.
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